Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Day Two -Stir Crazy

I woke at 6am on Tuesday morning, unable to sleep any longer with the sexual repression implement still in place.  I pulled back the sheets and examined the punishment machine.   It almost seemed to be feeding on what used to be my beautiful cock and ball sack.  Everything looked normal around my groin area, until you got to where its clear cock ring attached itself to my appendage.  Inside the CB6k, my genitals appeared to grow more deformed each day.  The shaft was now moist and stubby inside the clear tube.  Unable to proudly spread out anymore, it looked like a science experiment trapped in a cage.  In comparison, my scrotum was inflated beyond its normal size, its skin stretched by the build up of fluid and my pushed out testicles.  I began to wonder when my Master would allow my organs to recover, before subjecting them again to this plastic parasite.  

What my morning hard-on looks like now:











 










I tried not to think of it, and started my day.  Sitting on the toilet to take my morning piss seemed to become the new routine.  The clank of the plastic tag against the CB6k becoming background noise as I walked around my apartment naked, making coffee and fixing breakfast. 

It became clear that my elevated level of horniness was starting to affect my concentration.  I had trouble focusing on anything except the next time I might be able to stroke my meat, and feel my cream splatter on my chest and stomach.  I used to take masturbation for granted; it was having sex with other men that took some maneuvering.  I wondered whether my Master would call me today, and what he might allow me to do.  Sometimes the noticed that my hands were shaking.  I tried to keep my mind off of it by completing other tasks. 

I ordered the cock cage for the CB-6000S from the manufacturer.  The "S" is for small; it's the same thing as the CB6k, except the cock cage is only 2.5 inches in length, instead of 3.25 inches on the standard version.   It's made for boys like me with little peckers.  I think it will be more comfortable to wear, less noticeable in public and possibly make less mess when I urinate.  It arrives Wednesday. 

I tried biking in the park with the device.  It worked just fine.  I could feel the contraption between my legs, but it didn't prevent me from a good ride.  Also, the padding in my bicycle shorts helped spread the bulge out a little.

I waited that evening for Tieguy to call or message me and tell me my fate for the evening.  I watched TV to keep my mind off my situation.  He finally messaged me on Recon at almost midnight.  He agreed that I could take the chastity device off and that I was allowed to cum.  I promptly thanked him and prepared to set my boy meat free.  I decided to make a video, and it’s attached here.  I have edited the video to take away the boring parts – the original video was about 20mins, but I’ve edited down to 6mins.  Please understand that I’m not a professional porn actor or director, so the video is a bit amateur.

I sat down in a chair and got the materials ready.  I was really excited to finally be able touch my little peanut.  My dick had been locked up for 3 days and 2 nights – 60 hours in total.  As I cut the white plastic tag off, I said “freedom”.  I slowly removed the cock cage.  I also removed the parts of the ring, and when the final part of the ring was removed from my balls I gasped with relief.  I was amazed at how sensitive my shaft and helmet were, and my balls were still really tender.  I loved the mix of pleasure and pain when I started to massage them.

There were two other things I noticed when I took the CB6k off.  First, my dick smelled pretty bad.  I think some of the urine must have back-flowed and dried around the shaft, or my washing didn’t get under the device the way that I thought.  The odor was foul enough to make me stop and go wash my cock and balls in the bathroom sink. There were small pieces of the black nylon stocking that Tieguy used to get my cock into the unit from Sunday.  

The second thing I noticed is that after I achieved a full erection, my dick was visibly smaller then when this started.  I’m of Polish decent, and I think I’m above average compared to the guys that I’ve been with.  Now my boner looked at least half an inch, to an inch, smaller.  I have a humiliation fetish, and a small dick fantasy hits the belittlement button for me, but now this is turning into a reality! 

I applied some lube and jacked until a torrent of jizz wet my chest and stomach.   It was wonderful.  I went to bed and fell asleep instantly.  


video

First Full Day of Cock Captivity

I woke up hung-over at 5am.  As I pulled the sheets away, I looked down at my plastic encased boy prick.  It was straining inside the CB6k trying to stand at attention, but device made sure that my usual morning hard-on was now an uncomfortable reminder that my little pecker was not under my control.  I was both proud and ashamed of having given up my ability to pleasure myself, and allow someone to keep a foreign object locked to my sex organs.  

The alcohol the night before helped me sleep.   I drank a large glass of water, hoping to ease my hang-over.  As my confined erection subsided, I went to the bathroom to pee.  I've learned that the best way to urinate with a CB6k is to sit down on the toilet - like a woman.  I wondered if I would ever again pee standing up, like a real man.  The humiliation rush from that idea started my groin swelling again.  I guess the chastity instrument is separating me from my manhood in more ways than I had imagined.   

I returned to bed since it was so early, and tried to sleep.  I was now much more conscious of the plastic monster between my legs, as I found it difficult to find a comfortable position.  Every time I tossed or turned, the device would swing around, painfully pulling on my nut sack, like a weight at the end of rope.   Sometimes the contraption would get caught between my body and the bed causing me mild pain.  This got me stimulated, which kept me awake, tossing and turning - a vicious cycle.  

It was Memorial Day, so I took time to work on my blog.  Writing about my chastity experience kept me horny and blissfully frustrated.  

Tieguy was still in Chicago that day, and he messaged me on Recon at 8am.  He asked about my trip home, and if I was still locked up.  He also told me that when I cut the tag off, he wanted to choose the lock that would replace it. He would be home in New Orleans on Tuesday, and we could talk Tuesday evening or Wednesday.  

I got confused.  Did he want me to cut the tag?  I quickly messaged him back, telling him about my trip home, etc.  I asked him if he was giving me permission to cut the tag and let myself out.  I also said that I was willing to let him put any lock that he wished, and that was available at anytime he wanted to speak with me.  I got no response from Tieguy, which drove me absolutely crazy wondering if I would be allowed to spill some boy milk that day.  I know we agreed to would start slow, but it had only been 24 hours since my last ejaculation, and  I was secretly hoping to be kept secure for another night.   

After 4 hours of exasperation, I took the risk of annoying him by texting his cell phone.  I very politely asked if he wanted me to cut the tag and remove the CB6k.  After an hour of anxiously waiting for his reply, he texted me back, saying if I wasn't having problems, I was to stay locked up until he got home.  I immediately thanked him for clarifying his orders, and wished him a pleasant journey home.  Once more, it made me anxious that I still wasn't sure when I would be able to remove the evil apparatus from my cock and balls.  

Looking back on the messages, I noticed that the tone of the conversation changed with Tieguy. When I was with him in Chicago, I called him by his first name.  But after having my boy meat locked up for 24 hours, I started to address him as "Sir".  Also, my word choices were very respectful and more formal, to show him that I was aware of my new, reduced position.  

I also noticed that he called me "boi" in his initial text message, which I take is a feminine version of the word "boy."  I have to say that I don't like "boi"; anything feminine is a big turn-off for me.  Nothing would disgust me more than to dress up in women's clothing.  Even when Tieguy suggested that I buy some pantyhose to pull my shaft into the cock cage, I was repulsed.  However, looking down at the state of my genitals, I have no choice but to gladly accept any name that Tieguy decides to call me and be happy about it.  

It then occurred to me that Tieguy will likely be reading this blog, and that my posts give him exceptional access to get into my head.  He will know what I'm thinking and feeling, while I will always be guessing about his next move.  Now that he knows about my distain for anything female, will he try to use this in the future to debase me further?  In a few months of controlling me through chastity, will he start having me dress in drag to completely break me of any notions that I'm a man?  I get lightheaded from such a humiliation head-trip.  

It was a warm and sunny day in New York, so I ran some errands in my neighborhood.  I wore shorts and t-shirt.  The slight bulge is my shorts didn't seem to get many looks, but I was still nervous people might notice.   

I wanted to work out, so I found the tightest jock I could find and baggiest gym shorts.  I've observed that dark colors make the bulge less apparent.  At my gym, no one looked at my crotch, but I did notice that guys around me often adjusted the material on the front of their shorts.  They probably saw my lump in my shorts, and made sure they didn't have the same thing. Similar to when people see something on someone else's face, and out of nervous habit, wipe their own face (e.g. mouth or nose).  

I was glad that I was able to have a great workout while locked in the CB6k, and the idea of wearing a chastity device as part of a full-time lifestyle seemed even closer to reality.  One of my fantasies even before I went to IML, was to wear a CB to the gym and strip down in the locker room, shower, and have guys notice my imposed sexual restraint.  I often see guys that very carefully hide their private areas even in the locker room, by wrapping a towel around their waist before pulling down their underwear, and do the same getting dressed.  It is usually straight guys who are probably afraid that some fag is checking them out, but I wonder if its because their wife or girlfriend have them in chastity. If I get up enough courage to show my CB6k in the locker room, I will likely use the same technique to avoid embarrassment.  

When I was finished with my workout, I walked through the locker room to get some items I left in a locker.  I didn't change there, since I wore my work out clothes to the gym.  I saw 3 or 4 naked guys with nice bodies.  It made me jealous that their ample cocks were hanging freely from their bodies, and that they were mature enough to be their own masters.  I, on the other hand, had my little pee-pee taken away from me, the way a child loses his right to play his favorite toy after he fails to take care of it properly.  

After dinner and more blogging, I went to bed.  This was the second night of being locked up, and the sexual tension in me had significantly risen since the last night.  I found it very difficult to sleep.  My mind was racing with all kinds of sexual thoughts.  I wondered what kinds of rules that Tieguy might impose on me when we talked.  

I was so horny that I tried to relieve myself by stroking my ball sack, and pushing and pulling on the CB6k, making my shaft slide up and down in the lubed cock cage.  Since these actions were mildly stimulative, but not enough to make me cum, I only made my torment worse.  I was awake until at least 3am, and had been in confinement for almost 39 hours.  

Monday, May 25, 2009

Pervert at 32,000 feet

I woke at 8am in my hotel room.  Most of the soreness in my groin had dissipated from the prior night.  I began to toss and turn in my hotel bed, and started to get aroused by thought about being locked up in the CB-6000 for the flight back to New York. Since I couldn't get back to sleep, I started to stroke my still unencumbered shaft.  I didn't know when I would get the chance to jack-off again, so I masturbated until I came.  The orgasm wasn't great, but it did the trick.  As I came, I felt sort of guilty for beating off.  

Immediately after I shot my load,  the sexual tension in me subsided, and my selfish side began to emerge.   I began to have second thoughts about being put back into chastity.  After all, it would be totally inconvenient, and what's in it for me, anyway?  Luckily, the self-absorbed, little brat in me only lasted about 10-15 minuets.  

As I contemplated losing the ability to pleasure myself,  I started to get turned on all over again.  I thought about going through the airport and onto the plane with the contraption on. The possibility of the metal detector going off (perhaps because I forgot to take out coins or something), resulting in a pat-down by some burly, straight TSA officer where he feels the apparatus attached to my cock and balls, requiring me to pull down my jeans and underwear behind a curtain, and having to explain to him that it's a chastity device.  The image of him snickering at me sent my pituitary gland into hyper-drive.  

By 9am I was in the shower, getting cleaned up for my next test of sexual deprivation at the hands of another man.  I called Tieguy at 9:30am, the appointed time.  He didn't answer.  I called his cell and sent him a text message - still no response.  I went down for coffee and yogurt.  As I waited for him to call me back on my cell, it occurred to me that he might blow me off.  I started getting a little nervous and dejected.  I got back to my room at 10:15, and called his room again. Fortunately, he answered this time. I respectfully asked him to lock me up again, and he agreed.  Feeling elated, I went down to his room with a CB-6000 in my hand and a smile on my face.  

Initially, we talked about the plans for the confinement. We both agreed that it was best to start with short time periods, and slowly work up my endurance.  We didn't have time for all the details then, but agreed to talk more about the general parameters when we when both in our respective cities.  

Tieguy showed me how the CB-6000 works, and how to put it on.  He offered to start me on the largest ring size, since I had a lot of chafing yesterday.  He also used the largest spacer, that controls the distance between the ring and the cock cage.  This is the space where the scrotal sack is positioned.  If it's too big, it is possible to pull your balls through.  If the ring is too big, I might be able to hank my shaft out of the top of cage.  He allowed me to start in as much comfort as possible, and gradually work into tighter hardware.  He used a piece of lady's pantyhose to pull my shaft into the cock cage.  He told me to buy some at Duane Read when I got home, which is a head-trip in itself, but then he gave me a small piece of pantyhose to get started. Tieguy put a plastic numbered tag to lock it on (#442608), since anything metal might cause problems at the airport.  Once the appliance was firmly attached to my genitalia, I felt a wave of pride and a little nervousness.   I was dismissed and Tieguy promised to be in touch with me to check on my progress and discuss more detailed parameters on my new sexual restictions.  

Back in my room, I snapped some pics before checking out of the hotel.  








































This was the first time that I had the CB-6000 (CB6k) on.  I didn't realize that it would have different dimensions than the steel device that I wore the past two days.  On the downside, it was wider, which required me to maintain a wider stance when sitting.  Being plastic, it also is much lighter, which means that it is more comfortable and can be worn longer.  However, it sticks out, more than down.  This might be because it is lighter, whereas the weight of the steel device pulled my package down more.  The sticking out aspect of the CB6k was surprising to me. At the hotel, no one was fazed by a bulge in my jeans, since there were tons of half naked boys running around.  So, I wasn't aware how noticeable it was.  But when I got to the airport, it was a different story.  

I took a cab to the O'hare and after check-in with United, I went through security.  I was extremely careful to remove all metal objects from my body.  I went through with no problems.  My TSA fantasy would have to wait.  

As I walked to my gate,  I soon began to realize a few people were looking at my crotch.  I wondered it this was just paranoia on my part, so I started to look at my jeans in the various reflective surfaces of the terminal.  Nothing was noticeable looking straight on, as I did at the full length mirror in my hotel room.  However, if viewed from the side, there was a noticeable bulge in front.  Standing still, the bulge might be taken for a fold of material, but when I walk the bulge doesn't move, revealing that there is something pushing out on my jeans in that area.  My nervousness increased, and I began to wish that I had had the foresight to try on the CB6k before agreeing to be locked in it for an extended period of time in public.  

I tried to calm myself down.  Probably no one thinks it's a chastity device.  If anything, it makes me look very well endowed or half hard.  I realized that there was nothing I could about it, and its not like I knew these people anyway.  I preceded to the gate, and United announced that the flight was going to be an hour delayed.  

There was a cute guy in his late 20s sitting in the gate area, and he immediately noticed the bulge in my crotch and started to blatantly cruise me.  I was going to cruise him back, but then remembered the predicament that my sex organs were in, and realized it would be pointless to try to pick him up.  It started to sink in that I wasn't a totally free man anymore.  
  
Since we were delayed for a while, the urge to pee set in after a diet coke.  I thought it would be good to check my bulge in a real mirror anyway.  As I had done with the steel device, I went into a stall in the men's room, lifted the lid, spread my legs, leaned over the toilet bowl as much as possible, and let my golden stream flow. I quickly discovered another difference between the two contraptions.  

The CB6k had piss splashing everywhere - on the edge of the bowl and on the floor.  It turned into a big mess.  I was a little embarrassed and hoped no one would notice my botched urination. When I got to the mirror by the sink, I quickly forgot about the liquid in the stall.  In the reflection, I saw that some of my piss had splattered on my jeans.  There was a small, but very dark and damp spot at the base of crotch. It wasn't huge, but it was obvious that I had dribbled on my pants. My face turned red.  Now I had three of my deviant sexual hot buttons pushed: chastity, humiliation and water sports.  I virtual trifecta of my perversions. I started feeling the tightness of a constrained erection.   I tried not to look at anyone as walked by the other passengers at the gate, and kept my carry-on in front of me at all times.  

By the time the flight boarded, the wet spot in my jeans had faded somewhat.  I quickly got my seat by the window.  During the flight, decided to use the toilet on the plane.  I was learning how not to spill on myself, but I still need improvement in restroom tidiness.  I snapped a photo of my new friend and tormentor in the lavatory mirror. 
  

I know that you are not going to believe this, but it's true.  Just as I was about to take this picture, some guy opened the door to the restroom.  I had locked the door, but the bolt was stuck and wouldn't lock completely.  I instantly reached to close the door, and only saw part of the guy.  I wasn't sure how much he saw since I was facing away from the door, but the idea of him seeing me take a photo of my chastity device in an airplane lavatory, mortified me.  Could this flight get any better?  

We landed at LGA, and the wet spot was gone, but I still noticed people looking at my groin. I quickly got my luggage and grabbed a cab to my apartment.  Glad to be out of public areas, I relaxed a little and started to unpack.  

I spent some time on the CB website that makes the device I am wearing.  It turns out that they recently introduced a CB-6000S.  The S is for small.  The cock cage is only 2.5 inches long, instead of the regular 3.25 inches, which I have.  I took some time to examine the gadget afixed to my penis.  Unless I'm hard, my cock head doesn't reach into the helmut portion the end of the CB-6000.  Even when I'm hard it maybe half fills the space.  Reducing the length of the cock cage would make my it more comfortable when I sit down, and probably less visible in general. The company is closed until Tuesday, so I will decide what to do then.  

I also spent time on other male chastity sites, trying to educate myself as much as I could on my new way of life. Many of the website were pornographic and I got very aroused.  I was in my underwear by my computer, and found myself stroking the shaft of the cock cage.  It had no stimulative effect on my penis, but is exactly what I would have normally with to my own dick while viewing web porn before my confinement.  It reminded me of  smokers who are trying to quit and smoke fake, plastic cigarettes so they have something to do with their hands.  

I had a lot of pent up sexual energy after all that porn, and my customary outlet was closed.  So, I decided to try running in Central Park with the new equipment and see how it performed.  I put on the tightest jock I could find, to press the appliance as close into me as possible, in order to make it less discernible to others in the park.  I run in the park often, but that day I seemed to have a ton of energy.  I ended up running over 5 .5 miles at one of my best speeds.   Normally, I would have jacked off in front of my computer when I got home from a trip, and then been too tired for exercise. I'm finding forced orgasm denial has its benefits.  

After the run, I needed a shower.  There are times when you can forget that you are wearing a chastity device, but showering isn't one of them.  The appliance unavoidable; you look at and touch it.  It literally sticks out in front of you, and water splashes off it.   You carefully clean your new best friend and disciplinarian, because it has its jaws tightly gripped around your most precious asset.  After my shower, I dried off and straightened up my apartment still naked.  Every time I moved, the plastic number tag clinks against the cock cage.  So, not only can I see and feel the instrument of my belittlement, but I can hear it too.  It's a constant reminder of the new restricted status of my manhood.  

After a 5 mile run my chastity unit was chafing me quite a bit, and I started to get sore.  I put silicon lube in the inside of the cock cage using a Q-tip, and massaged some body lotion on my skin that touches the cock ring.  It felt better, although much looser.  I could see how someone might be able to escape.  I half tried to pull it out, but I could not get my shaft and cock head more than half way up the cock cage.   

Later that evening, I went out with friends to a gay bar called Therapy and got fairly drunk.  My friends didn't notice my new helper, probably because the bar was quite dark.  I got back to my place around 1:30am, and climbed into bed to experience the first night of real sexual deprivation.  It was weird to wear the contraption to bed, and it took time to find a position comfortable for both of us.  

Sunday, May 24, 2009

IML 2009 - my first taste of enforced restraint



I attended International Mr. Leather (IML) in Chicago over Memorial Day weekend, and played with Tieguy7001 (Recon screen name) from New Orleans.  I've always been turned on by the fantasy of chastity, and Tieguy told me me in advance that he would put me in a few devices.  Chastity is in my recon profile - my screen name is CumboyNYC.  Although I've been in a CB-3000 once before, it was just part of a bondage scene and not real chastity.  

On Friday afternoon of IML, Tieguy played with me and another sub (BoundHard).  We were both locked in various chastity devices; Tieguy has quite an extensive collection. Tieguy informed me that he had few boys in long distance chastity arrangements, some of whom have not been allowed to cum for months.  This got me totally turned on. 

The scene ended with BoundHard drenching my face with his cum.  Although BoundHard got release, Tieguy  kept me locked up in a German made, steel cock cage/tube without letting me climax. I asked him to let me out as evening was approaching, since I wanted to enjoy my night at IML.  He told me to keep it on for the evening, and come back at the end of the night to plead my case for freedom.  He gave me a jock cup to cover the devise, because I was going to a rubber party that night and I didn't want to have the steel cage rip my rubber outfit.  

Around 11pm that night, Tieguy agreed to let me out, only after I volunteered to have him lock me up the following morning, and keep me confined for a longer period of time. My dick was locked up that day for about 7 hours.  I got off that night to a powerful orgasm; the last time I shot a load was 2 days prior.  

The next morning I jerked off at 8am, because I was horny at the thought of giving up control of my dick to Tieguy once more.  I took a shower and shaved my ball sac and dick in preparation for another day of cock imprisonment.  At 10am, I stopped by Tieguy's room at the Hilton (where IML was being held) and I asked him to lock me up again, with the only stipulation that he unlock me in time for my flight back to NYC. He agreed and put me back in the same stainless steel cock cage/tube from yesterday, and then sent me on my way.  


















The device was initially very comfortable.  I went for lunch in downtown Chicago and the Art Institute of Chicago museum. I wore baggy shorts, since the weather was nice, and nobody seemed to notice anything.  I was also able to piss standing up without problems in stalls of the mens' rooms of the restaurant and the museum; I was too shy to use a urinal.  

 






















The German made steel devise has a hole at the base or tip to let urine out. It has its locking mechanism built into the device at the top of the tube and a custom made key. This means that it doesn't use a small padlock as similar models do.  Tieguy explained to me that the advantage to this is that it cannot be removed with a lock cutter.   If the key is lost, I'm fucked.  

During the day, I kept getting aroused by having my dick encased in steel, which led to a pleasant discomfort and private humiliation.  It wasn't long before I started a mild case of blue balls.  I began to realize how much I liked the position that I was in, and that I enjoyed the reality of chastity even better than my fantasies of it.  It occurred to me that this didn't have to end at IML just because of the metal detectors at O'hare.  I called Tieguy and asked if he would lock me up again the morning of my flight in a CB-6000 and keep me sexually constrained as one of his long distance supplicants. Luckily for me, he agreed.  The CB line is made of plastic and does not set off the metal detectors at airports.  

That afternoon I tried on a new rubber outfit, which has an open crotch and ass, from Mr S. at the IML leathermart. [http://www.mr-s-leather.com/R310.html] I was still wearing the steel tube device.  When came out of the changing area, I walked round their booth barefoot looking for a mirror.  I noticed that I got a lot of looks, and compliments, from other guys.  So, I bought it.  I also picked up a CB-6000 from the Stockroom (another vendor).  


I wore the new rubber suit to a Chicago Hellfire party at the Hilton, with the very shinny steel cock cage covering my dick and pushing my balls forward.  A few guys at the party approached me and asked me about it.  I was flattered.  Tieguy arranged for me to go with him to the Hellfire club later that night.  

I changed into jeans and Fred Perry polo shirt, and went to dinner with some friends. By now the device was starting to get heavy, and my balls wear really getting sore.  No one noticed anything under my jeans at the restaurant.  I made the best of my aches and the tenderness around my ball sac.  

For the Hellfire bondage club, I wore the same rubber suit and, of course, the steel device was still there.  Tieguy played with his boys and put me in a leather collar that connected to a strap down my back with wrist cuffs.  The steel device stayed on my genitals the whole time; I was not allowed to cum.  Occasionally, guys would come by and give it a light slap.  Normally, this wouldn't hurt at all.  But given how sore and chafed I was, the mild smacks on my encased cock and balls sent me into agony.  We were drinking a lot of diet coke at the club, so I had to take a leak.  There was a piss pig in the bathroom; he seemed to like drinking my urine from the steel chastity device.  

Back at the hotel around 1am, I pleaded with Tieguy to be released from his cock cage. My arguments were that my scrotum was really aching and that I didn't think that I would be able to make it through the night. I am interested in trying chastity overnight, and waking the next morning to rediscover a contraption keeping me from my genitals.  However, given the extreme tenderness, I didn't think that I could do it that night.  Also, I argued I would be back again with the CB-6000 tomorrow morning before my flight, when he could keep me locked up even longer.  Tieguy proved to be merciful, and unlocked me.  My dick plopped out nicely, and it held the shape of the metal tube for a few seconds.  Getting the steel cock ring, which is part of the device, off my cock and balls was a bit more painful.  My cock had been in confinement for about 15 hours.   I was given a kiss as I left his room with instructions of when to call tomorrow.  

My orgasm that night, surprisingly, took more work than usual and wasn't without pain.  I felt a lot of soreness and tenderness as I stroked my meat and played with my nuts.  I came with some discomfort, but I was very happy.  I fell asleep thinking of how strong and rapid the lure to chastity play was developing in me, and where this was going to lead.